28 December 08
By Crystal Laramore
Ohhh Santa!
Sooooo. Was everybody good this year? Did you all get what you wanted for Christmas? Did you get something you didn’t even know you wanted? Hopefully everyone had a surprise or two in their stocking. And for all you mean people out there…well, we hope you got what you deserve as well.
What about giving? Did you give some special gifts? Did you give some funny gifts? Those are my favorite. I love finding that perfect funny gift that makes me LOL IN the store! I gave my sister a compact mirror that read: Eat, Drink & Remarry! LOL! LOL! LOL!
I wonder if anyone who’s been reading my Blogs can guess what my predominant gift was this year to give-to my girlfriends… I’ll give you a hint: It was a book…Ok, I gave out several copies of “Why Men Love Bit*hes”. I giggled soooo much giving out those books to my girlfriends. And guys don’t get your tinsel in a tangle. Bit*h isn’t defined as you might think. No one wants to be around a traditional bit*h, but everyone wants to be around a self-assured woman who is not a doormat. Get the book. If you are a man, get the book for your woman. Or your daughter. Or your sister. Or your mother…
Face Book gave me an unexpected gift; they took a stand against women showing themselves breast-feeding their babies on their site. What IS the point of showing the world (what should be) a private moment between a woman and her newborn baby? No it’s NOT porn but some sicko out there will certainly turn something beautiful into something ugly. What is the big deal about keeping it off the big screen? Are we that narcissistic? Is there ANYTHING left (apparently not for the Left) that we want to keep sacred and private?
But I digress…a long time ago a woman I worked with was getting new carpet in her house for Christmas and the look on my face could have doubled on a horror flick. How impersonal! Doesn’t HE get to use the carpet TOO? Anyway it was what she wanted. It took me over twenty years to appreciate that. This Christmas I got an ice machine! Not only did mama get a brand new ice machine but also, Santa kicked the mean ice machine-man out of my restaurant! It was great! Scrooge vs. Santa. Santa won!
Another great Christmas gift I received this year was a box of Blue Diamond Organic crackers. Glutton-free too! I don’t really know what glutton is, but I do know it’s some really good stuff! So, whatever the Blue Diamond people are putting in their crackers, to make up for taking out the glutton, its working. I’ve been coveting my girlfriend Kathy’s crackers (no, not her big-a$ house, just her crack-ers) for so long that she bought me 87 boxes of various flavors of these addictive crack(hmmm)ers. Secretly, Kathy must wonder if I’m there to visit her or the crack-ers…I DO spend a lot of time in her pantry. Anyway, the presents you never even thought of are the ones that mean the most. I certainly think she was LOL IN the store!
Just a little side note: In all fairness, Kathy owes me all the crack-ers I can eat in my lifetime. When I was sad, depressed and barely hanging on by my chewed up fingernails, doing the ugly cry on the freeway one Sunday evening, I pulled over to pull it together and called my “friend” Kathy. See, when you are depressed you need to know where all of your friends live and you need to know all of their addictions so you can choose who will best fit your needs at any particular point in your meltdown/healing process. This particular night I needed wine and since my sister was and hour and half south, I called Kathy. And women all around the world know the ugly-must have wine- cry when they hear it.
And you need to choose girlfriends with really great husbands too. Ron (Kathy’s husband) built us a fire, told me what a *&(^%$ Richard was, drank a little wine (not too much or we’ll get pissed off that you’re into our stash) with us and then politely dismissed himself so we could trash the male species as a whole.
After we drank the case, err, I mean a few bottles of wine, Kathy showed me to my suite and made sure I was still breathing before she closed the door. When I awoke the next morning, sleepy, groggy and following the scent of coffee, I staggered down the long hallway to the great room. The 47 dogs she has rescued surrounded me and before I could really think I heard one of the dogs squawking really loud. Hmmm. What a strange noise to be coming from a dog…then I looked up just in time to see a 10-foot span of green feathers flying at me-Ahhh the squawking seems to be coming from the moving green thing-And the moving green thing is on my freaking head-BITING my freaking ear! Have you ever heard that girl that’s about to be killed in Friday the 13th scream? Well, Arthur did. I think it was the blood-curdling scream I had needed to get out for a while anyway. Pain and relief at the same time….Ahhhhh. So, for Christmas Arthur got a bullet from me, and it sits on top of his cage. Snicker.
Another great gift was the Copenhaver’s. On Saturday I had the door locked after lunch and Santa must have unlocked it just for Barry & Judy Copenhaver. We drank a few beers and visited and then they were off. They are the couple I wrote the “Respect” article about. I served with their daughter Jill in Baghdad, Iraq. Keep up. And on Tuesday Jill followed suit and the visit was complete!
Anyway, the most important gifts come from the heart. And I gave myself a gift as well; the gift of letting go. Richard got a Dear Jon (that is funnier than most of you know!) letter and I mailed “The Box”. The great thing about letting go is you can look back and realize that what you had wasn’t what you thought you were getting anyway. All the advice from your friends and family finally, after all those tears, makes sense. When the smoke signals settled and the wild look in my eyes calmed down, when the wild kitties and squirrels felt it was safe to return, I was able to look at the man I was crying over and realize I was crying over the idea of him, not him. People can tell you a lot of things but actions really do speak louder than words. Ladies, Gentlemen, KNOW what you want. And know when the show is over.
For decades I’ve told thousands of people, “Until you let go of the negative (no matter if it’s a job or a partner or a friend, or glutton…) you cannot make room for the positive”. As soon as I let go of the negative, the positive was right there; the positive energy, the positive thought process, the positive people, etc. “Let go and let God” is not just a pretty little phrase. It’s what I did and I’m grateful, soooo grateful for the people God put in my life to help me through such a difficult time. Ok, THEY may not be so grateful, but sacrifices do have to be made in the name of love and friendship! And thank GOD they love me!
I spent some time looking back over some of their wisdom-filled emails they wrote over the last several months and just LMAO! What’s that song…”I can see clearly now the rain is gone…”? It’s like Dah! And really (truly) I’m not bitter… Bitterness leads to Botox people!
Merry Christmas AC, Deb, Laura, Greg, Jacqueline, Kathy, Ron, Dale (AKA Santa), Bill, Bob and yes, even you Richard.
Match.com: 120.00/year
Dinner with an idiot: Free
Letting go: Priceless
Showing posts with label Cyber Dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cyber Dating. Show all posts
Monday, January 5, 2009
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Independent, Confident Women…So, you think you want one do ya?
By Crystal Laramore
Editing by Deborah Martin
Independent, Confident Women…So, you think you want one do ya?
If I’ve heard it once, I’ve heard it a thousand times (from men): “I want an independent and confident woman” (IC). Really, because I seem to be hearing from my IC girlfriends and fans of the article that the men aren’t handling them very well. This is the mantra I’ve heard for years: “He says he wants an independent, confident woman but he gets upset whenever I cannot spend time with him or I have to attend to my business”.
So, back to you (men) and your desire to have an IC woman in your life; do you know that territory well? Let me help you. This will not be your typical relationship. It will be plagued with conversations like: Honey, I can’t make dinner tonight, I have a meeting. Honey, can you pick up the children; I’ve got to run the brokerage firm this afternoon. One of my staff members is sick today so I’ll have to work late, again. Sorry, I know we had plans; I’ll make it up to you.
It’s also plagued with conversation styles like: Baby, why don’t you go play golf with your buddies; I’ve got a luncheon with my girlfriends and I’ll be home late. Hey, I already fixed the dryer, what are you doing? Look honey, I moved the furniture all by myself! Baby, see all my new power tools? Honey, I’ve booked us an African Safari; No, the children are not invited.
Independent women are stubborn, tough as nails and decisive; some men might confuse this with being controlling-don’t fall for it for one second! As smart women we often see where things can be better, not only in our partners but in ourselves so we're quick to admit our faults and try to work on them. Occasionally we might slip and this is when we need you to be our great defender and understand we are coming from a place of love as well as a know-it-all attitude. We’re sorry but we are worth the frustration. We love and respect a man who also wants to improve himself and is not threatened if we gently point out an area of improvement he could make in his own life or his part of our relationship
I believe MOST of the independent women out there are over 40. Certainly women in their 20's are still trying to figure out who they are, what they want and whether or not they really are like their mothers. Women over 40 (and maybe late 30's) have already been through the career thing, the relationship thing, the mommy thing and are finally comfortable in their own skin. They know what kind of man they want for the second half of their lives and this is a good thing for men because we won't waste THEIR time if they aren't right for us whereas a younger woman WILL because she's still trying to change the guy or she’s waiting for him to live up to his "potential". An older woman knows that if a man over 40 hasn't lived up to his potential YET, then he probably never will and/or the “potential” was all in our 20-something mind in the first place. My dad sent me a card one time that read “If you love something set it free. If it just sits there on the couch unaware that it’s been set free, you’ve probably already married it”. Sorry. I couldn’t help it…
As we get older we jump to fewer conclusions, are slower to anger and we are more patient. I love what Andy Rooney has to say about older women:
“As I grown in age, I value women who are over 40 most of all. Here are just a view reasons why:
A woman over 40 will not lie next to you in bed and ask, “What are you thinking?” She really doesn’t care what you think.
If a woman over 40 doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it’s usually something more interesting.
A woman over 40 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she wants, and what she wants from whom.
Few women over 40 give a damn about what you might think of her or what she’s doing.
Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won’t hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.
Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it’s like to be unappreciated.
A woman over 40 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn’t trust the guy with other women.
Women over 40 couldn’t care less if you’re attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won’t betray her.
Women get psychic with age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. They always know.
A woman over 40 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens.
Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Older women are forthright and honest. They’ll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one.
You don’t ever have to wonder where you stand with her. Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons.
Unfortunately it is not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well dressed hot woman of 40+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool out of himself with some 18-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.
For all those men who say, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?” Here’s an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.”
We do want a man in our life but we don’t necessarily need him to define who we are. We need you for love, companionship, support, strength, leadership…Did you hear that? We want YOU to be our leader. Yes, we are independent and we are confident enough to want, nay expect, you to be our leader. We will not ask you to save us on a regular basis. It may happen a time or two (or three) and maybe, just once, kinda, sorta make it up so you get the chance to be something you LOVE to be – our hero! We’re also smart. We will definitely call on you in a true crisis; otherwise we are resourceful and you may never even know we knocked down the garage wall with our new car. (See my mom for more details!)
We will tell you what we want and when we want it. We will be direct so, be prepared: when you ask us what’s wrong, we’ll tell you. Not like when we were mere youngsters and always said, “Nothing” when you asked what was wrong and then we made you pay later because you didn’t read our minds. No, IC (independent and confident if you’ve forgotten) women don’t have a lot of time to waste playing patty-cake. We’d rather be spending time with you doing other things… And speaking of doing other things, we are fine alone. If you need to be off saving the world or tending to personal matters, you just go right ahead. We have plenty to do.
Lucky for you, you’ll never have to worry about an independent woman dragging you to a chick flick; we’ll go with our like-minded chick friends or we’ll be happy to go alone. We’ll save the action flicks for a hot date with you. And thank your lucky stars that we will not expect you to work yourself into an early grave so we can travel the globe. No, we will work too so we can retire early and travel the globe together.
We are also sexy, charming, great conversationalists, opinionated, secure in our skin and typically not jealous. If you think you’d be happier on the other side of the fence, we’ll give you a lift over it. We’ll be sad for all of a New York Minute and then be better off without you - at the spa; spas are great places to rub off dead skin and other unwanted surface matter. We’re confident enough to cry and joyous enough to laugh, and smart enough to love you the way you want to be loved.
We also want you to treat us like women, like ladies. We want you to open our doors, order our dinner, pick out the wine (Ok, on this one we may not be able to keep our opinions to ourselves), take off our coats, help us put them back on, slip off our shoes, pull out our chairs and stand whenever we need to get up from the table. We want you to speak to us with respect and dignity, love and consideration. We want to be romanced and put upon a pedestal. And guess what, we are worth every ounce of energy you put into our relationship. You’ll get back ten fold what you put into it, because we are also generous. But we are NOT pushovers. Never mistake our kindness for weakness, for we are very strong.
You can be proud to take us camping or to meet the President of the United States of America. We can wear jeans or a fur coat. Actually, they look really good together! We’ll stay at the Four Seasons or in a tent, as long as you are with us we really don’t care. Want to go fishing? We’ll be glad to go with you or happy to have you go with your friends. We’ll not dictate to you how to live your life. First of all, we trust that you already know how it should be lived and second of all, we don’t want you dictating to us. We’ll treat you with respect and kindness. We know you have goals and dreams just like we do and we’ll not stand in your way. We will ask you how we can help you be all that you can be.
But be ready for a passionate debate on important issues. We have strong minds and we will not sit quietly if we think we have something to add or if we think you are making a mistake. In the end though, your decision is final. We will not whimper around to get our way. We’re much too independent for that.
Our disagreements may be fierce but we do not hold a grudge. We want to win the war (you) and not the battle (the argument). We will be proud of your accomplishments, defend you in public and never humiliate you. We are not needy or desperate. Remember, we are independent and confident. It might be a recipe you’ve not had before but the ingredients sure make for a very happy, spontaneous, fulfilling life full of love, laughter, adventure and yes, romance.
We are as loyal as any golden retriever and we will trust you until you give us reason not to. However, I dare say that you’ll not find many truly IC women standing by their man after he has betrayed us. If you are a Bill Clinton or a John Edwards and you are married to one of us, you’ll find yourself alone at the press conferences; unless your mistress is there. Yep, while your treachery is being played out by the world-wide media, while you are at the podium pontificating on the woes of your life, lying through your teeth about when, where and how much money…we’ll most likely be with the d-i-v-o-r-c-e attorney.
And if you tell us you need your space, be prepared to feel like you are in the Astrodome alone. And be prepared that while basking in your new-found spacious life we may fill our space with new furniture. Careful what you wish for.
But, for you loyal, trustworthy ones out there, if you are lucky enough to find an Independent, Confident woman, put on your running shoes cuz we’re gonna let you do the chasing. And when you catch us you’ll find it’s a ride worth taking. Fasten your seat belts and don’t worry about the speed limit. I know the new Sheriff!
Editing by Deborah Martin
Independent, Confident Women…So, you think you want one do ya?
If I’ve heard it once, I’ve heard it a thousand times (from men): “I want an independent and confident woman” (IC). Really, because I seem to be hearing from my IC girlfriends and fans of the article that the men aren’t handling them very well. This is the mantra I’ve heard for years: “He says he wants an independent, confident woman but he gets upset whenever I cannot spend time with him or I have to attend to my business”.
So, back to you (men) and your desire to have an IC woman in your life; do you know that territory well? Let me help you. This will not be your typical relationship. It will be plagued with conversations like: Honey, I can’t make dinner tonight, I have a meeting. Honey, can you pick up the children; I’ve got to run the brokerage firm this afternoon. One of my staff members is sick today so I’ll have to work late, again. Sorry, I know we had plans; I’ll make it up to you.
It’s also plagued with conversation styles like: Baby, why don’t you go play golf with your buddies; I’ve got a luncheon with my girlfriends and I’ll be home late. Hey, I already fixed the dryer, what are you doing? Look honey, I moved the furniture all by myself! Baby, see all my new power tools? Honey, I’ve booked us an African Safari; No, the children are not invited.
Independent women are stubborn, tough as nails and decisive; some men might confuse this with being controlling-don’t fall for it for one second! As smart women we often see where things can be better, not only in our partners but in ourselves so we're quick to admit our faults and try to work on them. Occasionally we might slip and this is when we need you to be our great defender and understand we are coming from a place of love as well as a know-it-all attitude. We’re sorry but we are worth the frustration. We love and respect a man who also wants to improve himself and is not threatened if we gently point out an area of improvement he could make in his own life or his part of our relationship
I believe MOST of the independent women out there are over 40. Certainly women in their 20's are still trying to figure out who they are, what they want and whether or not they really are like their mothers. Women over 40 (and maybe late 30's) have already been through the career thing, the relationship thing, the mommy thing and are finally comfortable in their own skin. They know what kind of man they want for the second half of their lives and this is a good thing for men because we won't waste THEIR time if they aren't right for us whereas a younger woman WILL because she's still trying to change the guy or she’s waiting for him to live up to his "potential". An older woman knows that if a man over 40 hasn't lived up to his potential YET, then he probably never will and/or the “potential” was all in our 20-something mind in the first place. My dad sent me a card one time that read “If you love something set it free. If it just sits there on the couch unaware that it’s been set free, you’ve probably already married it”. Sorry. I couldn’t help it…
As we get older we jump to fewer conclusions, are slower to anger and we are more patient. I love what Andy Rooney has to say about older women:
“As I grown in age, I value women who are over 40 most of all. Here are just a view reasons why:
A woman over 40 will not lie next to you in bed and ask, “What are you thinking?” She really doesn’t care what you think.
If a woman over 40 doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it’s usually something more interesting.
A woman over 40 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she wants, and what she wants from whom.
Few women over 40 give a damn about what you might think of her or what she’s doing.
Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won’t hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.
Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it’s like to be unappreciated.
A woman over 40 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn’t trust the guy with other women.
Women over 40 couldn’t care less if you’re attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won’t betray her.
Women get psychic with age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. They always know.
A woman over 40 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens.
Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Older women are forthright and honest. They’ll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one.
You don’t ever have to wonder where you stand with her. Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons.
Unfortunately it is not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well dressed hot woman of 40+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool out of himself with some 18-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.
For all those men who say, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?” Here’s an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.”
We do want a man in our life but we don’t necessarily need him to define who we are. We need you for love, companionship, support, strength, leadership…Did you hear that? We want YOU to be our leader. Yes, we are independent and we are confident enough to want, nay expect, you to be our leader. We will not ask you to save us on a regular basis. It may happen a time or two (or three) and maybe, just once, kinda, sorta make it up so you get the chance to be something you LOVE to be – our hero! We’re also smart. We will definitely call on you in a true crisis; otherwise we are resourceful and you may never even know we knocked down the garage wall with our new car. (See my mom for more details!)
We will tell you what we want and when we want it. We will be direct so, be prepared: when you ask us what’s wrong, we’ll tell you. Not like when we were mere youngsters and always said, “Nothing” when you asked what was wrong and then we made you pay later because you didn’t read our minds. No, IC (independent and confident if you’ve forgotten) women don’t have a lot of time to waste playing patty-cake. We’d rather be spending time with you doing other things… And speaking of doing other things, we are fine alone. If you need to be off saving the world or tending to personal matters, you just go right ahead. We have plenty to do.
Lucky for you, you’ll never have to worry about an independent woman dragging you to a chick flick; we’ll go with our like-minded chick friends or we’ll be happy to go alone. We’ll save the action flicks for a hot date with you. And thank your lucky stars that we will not expect you to work yourself into an early grave so we can travel the globe. No, we will work too so we can retire early and travel the globe together.
We are also sexy, charming, great conversationalists, opinionated, secure in our skin and typically not jealous. If you think you’d be happier on the other side of the fence, we’ll give you a lift over it. We’ll be sad for all of a New York Minute and then be better off without you - at the spa; spas are great places to rub off dead skin and other unwanted surface matter. We’re confident enough to cry and joyous enough to laugh, and smart enough to love you the way you want to be loved.
We also want you to treat us like women, like ladies. We want you to open our doors, order our dinner, pick out the wine (Ok, on this one we may not be able to keep our opinions to ourselves), take off our coats, help us put them back on, slip off our shoes, pull out our chairs and stand whenever we need to get up from the table. We want you to speak to us with respect and dignity, love and consideration. We want to be romanced and put upon a pedestal. And guess what, we are worth every ounce of energy you put into our relationship. You’ll get back ten fold what you put into it, because we are also generous. But we are NOT pushovers. Never mistake our kindness for weakness, for we are very strong.
You can be proud to take us camping or to meet the President of the United States of America. We can wear jeans or a fur coat. Actually, they look really good together! We’ll stay at the Four Seasons or in a tent, as long as you are with us we really don’t care. Want to go fishing? We’ll be glad to go with you or happy to have you go with your friends. We’ll not dictate to you how to live your life. First of all, we trust that you already know how it should be lived and second of all, we don’t want you dictating to us. We’ll treat you with respect and kindness. We know you have goals and dreams just like we do and we’ll not stand in your way. We will ask you how we can help you be all that you can be.
But be ready for a passionate debate on important issues. We have strong minds and we will not sit quietly if we think we have something to add or if we think you are making a mistake. In the end though, your decision is final. We will not whimper around to get our way. We’re much too independent for that.
Our disagreements may be fierce but we do not hold a grudge. We want to win the war (you) and not the battle (the argument). We will be proud of your accomplishments, defend you in public and never humiliate you. We are not needy or desperate. Remember, we are independent and confident. It might be a recipe you’ve not had before but the ingredients sure make for a very happy, spontaneous, fulfilling life full of love, laughter, adventure and yes, romance.
We are as loyal as any golden retriever and we will trust you until you give us reason not to. However, I dare say that you’ll not find many truly IC women standing by their man after he has betrayed us. If you are a Bill Clinton or a John Edwards and you are married to one of us, you’ll find yourself alone at the press conferences; unless your mistress is there. Yep, while your treachery is being played out by the world-wide media, while you are at the podium pontificating on the woes of your life, lying through your teeth about when, where and how much money…we’ll most likely be with the d-i-v-o-r-c-e attorney.
And if you tell us you need your space, be prepared to feel like you are in the Astrodome alone. And be prepared that while basking in your new-found spacious life we may fill our space with new furniture. Careful what you wish for.
But, for you loyal, trustworthy ones out there, if you are lucky enough to find an Independent, Confident woman, put on your running shoes cuz we’re gonna let you do the chasing. And when you catch us you’ll find it’s a ride worth taking. Fasten your seat belts and don’t worry about the speed limit. I know the new Sheriff!
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Cyber Dating
Sex in the Woods
by Crystal Laramore
Let’s talk about cyber space dating: Since we live in the woods it’s kind of hard finding someone to date; it’s not like being in a big city where single people are around every corner. It’s like being in the woods where everyone is married to someone you know!
So, I joined YAHOO!Personals for a test drive. Interesting. Out of 145 profiles they sent my way I was interested in 5. You 5 know who you are. Last week I said men should do the majority of the calling, but what about in cyber dating? Do women really want to give thier number to strangers? TOTAL strangers. Not only are they strangers, but some are not close to who they say they are. My friend Sophia got an email from Richard and his picture looked like an ad for Armani suits. Richard said he was a jewelry designer and originally from Italy and wrote in such poor English one minute and fluent the next…we decided something was amiss. When Sophia asked Richard for some more photos, like in casual settings or with friends and family, he closed communication.
Maybe there should be an exception about calling in this environment. I have given out my business telephone number twice. You can also block your number when you call. And, this is what I’d do at the very least; can someone say “background check”? Now, don’t go doing a background check on every person you meet in cyber space, but certainly on the ones you open communication with and certainly before it goes to the intimate stage.
Last week we discussed men and how they like challenges and things that are difficult. By that I meant difficult like in stick shifts,
When I say that men like difficult I don’t mean difficult women. My friend Richard said that there are a lot of physco women out there. Well, I wondered what he meant by physco and he explained that two dates does not a relationship make. And if he doesn’t call you-please, don’t call him, and call him, and call him, and call…
Don’t Google his address, drive by his house to see if he’s home or has someone else there. Don’t show up where you know he hangs out. Just let it go! Seriously, why would anyone want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with them? Our lives are so much more harmonious when we are in symbiotic relationships.
Beautiful, insecure women are not attractive. An average, secure woman will beat her hands down every time. Move on ladies, there are plenty of men out there.
Spilling the beans: Ladies, give the new man in your life little peeks into your psyche, no need to do a total mind dump on him in the first ten minutes. Breathe! There is no need to tell him all your wonderful qualities in a 30 second commercial. You are not a candidate running for office. You are a prize trophy that he will hunt, in less than perfect conditions, to catch. You are not there to scream “pick me, vote for me”, you are there to show him, little by little, that you can keep him challenged for more than a nano-second.
How does all this come about? SLOWLY! But first ladies, you must set some guidelines for yourself and the relationship. Remember he’s the hunter, so let him do the hunting. This translates into he is the one to make the phone calls, he picks you up for dates, he plans the dates and did I mention he makes the phone calls? If ever you find yourself dialing his number decide whether you want him to be Mr. Right or Mr. Right Now. The woman walking down the isle did not do the hunting. That couple is symbolic of hunter and prey. And if she’s smart, he’ll still be hunting her long after the honeymoon.
I am the owner and executive chef of a successful restaurant. We serve gourmet food. I cannot remember the last time I cooked dinner for a man; unless I saw him at the restaurant on Thursday-Saturday evenings between 6&10 pm. Sometimes, I even instruct the staff to give them a check. The point is not that I’m desperate for cash, the point is that he needs to be desperate to show me he is worthy of a (free) meal that I have slaved over a hot stove in a hot kitchen to prepare or paid my staff to prepare, either way…
Women tend to show all their cards on the first round while men keep their cards close to the vest.
Cleopatra had a muse. She went to her muse to find out how to capture the attention of her prey (Cesar). The muse asked what kind of man he was. Cleopatra answered that he was a conqueror. The muse said simply, “Then always let him think there is more to conquer”!
If the natural order of things occurs; like women allowing men to hunt, the men will make the woman happy. Men enjoy pleasing women. I hear it all the time. Cuz when mama’s happy, everybody’s happy and when mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!
by Crystal Laramore
Let’s talk about cyber space dating: Since we live in the woods it’s kind of hard finding someone to date; it’s not like being in a big city where single people are around every corner. It’s like being in the woods where everyone is married to someone you know!
So, I joined YAHOO!Personals for a test drive. Interesting. Out of 145 profiles they sent my way I was interested in 5. You 5 know who you are. Last week I said men should do the majority of the calling, but what about in cyber dating? Do women really want to give thier number to strangers? TOTAL strangers. Not only are they strangers, but some are not close to who they say they are. My friend Sophia got an email from Richard and his picture looked like an ad for Armani suits. Richard said he was a jewelry designer and originally from Italy and wrote in such poor English one minute and fluent the next…we decided something was amiss. When Sophia asked Richard for some more photos, like in casual settings or with friends and family, he closed communication.
Maybe there should be an exception about calling in this environment. I have given out my business telephone number twice. You can also block your number when you call. And, this is what I’d do at the very least; can someone say “background check”? Now, don’t go doing a background check on every person you meet in cyber space, but certainly on the ones you open communication with and certainly before it goes to the intimate stage.
Last week we discussed men and how they like challenges and things that are difficult. By that I meant difficult like in stick shifts,
When I say that men like difficult I don’t mean difficult women. My friend Richard said that there are a lot of physco women out there. Well, I wondered what he meant by physco and he explained that two dates does not a relationship make. And if he doesn’t call you-please, don’t call him, and call him, and call him, and call…
Don’t Google his address, drive by his house to see if he’s home or has someone else there. Don’t show up where you know he hangs out. Just let it go! Seriously, why would anyone want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with them? Our lives are so much more harmonious when we are in symbiotic relationships.
Beautiful, insecure women are not attractive. An average, secure woman will beat her hands down every time. Move on ladies, there are plenty of men out there.
Spilling the beans: Ladies, give the new man in your life little peeks into your psyche, no need to do a total mind dump on him in the first ten minutes. Breathe! There is no need to tell him all your wonderful qualities in a 30 second commercial. You are not a candidate running for office. You are a prize trophy that he will hunt, in less than perfect conditions, to catch. You are not there to scream “pick me, vote for me”, you are there to show him, little by little, that you can keep him challenged for more than a nano-second.
How does all this come about? SLOWLY! But first ladies, you must set some guidelines for yourself and the relationship. Remember he’s the hunter, so let him do the hunting. This translates into he is the one to make the phone calls, he picks you up for dates, he plans the dates and did I mention he makes the phone calls? If ever you find yourself dialing his number decide whether you want him to be Mr. Right or Mr. Right Now. The woman walking down the isle did not do the hunting. That couple is symbolic of hunter and prey. And if she’s smart, he’ll still be hunting her long after the honeymoon.
I am the owner and executive chef of a successful restaurant. We serve gourmet food. I cannot remember the last time I cooked dinner for a man; unless I saw him at the restaurant on Thursday-Saturday evenings between 6&10 pm. Sometimes, I even instruct the staff to give them a check. The point is not that I’m desperate for cash, the point is that he needs to be desperate to show me he is worthy of a (free) meal that I have slaved over a hot stove in a hot kitchen to prepare or paid my staff to prepare, either way…
Women tend to show all their cards on the first round while men keep their cards close to the vest.
Cleopatra had a muse. She went to her muse to find out how to capture the attention of her prey (Cesar). The muse asked what kind of man he was. Cleopatra answered that he was a conqueror. The muse said simply, “Then always let him think there is more to conquer”!
If the natural order of things occurs; like women allowing men to hunt, the men will make the woman happy. Men enjoy pleasing women. I hear it all the time. Cuz when mama’s happy, everybody’s happy and when mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!
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